Baby weight

A lot has happened in the time since I last wrote here and, whilst I intended to tell many stories to you over the past few weeks, I have been so ill that even the thought of trying to write a somewhat sensible blog entry made me dizzy. But I’m on the mend, and maybe I’ll tell you all those stories another time. For now, I’m staying with recent events.


Despite what the above photo might imply, I have not somehow become a surrogate carrier for my child. No, instead I have simply started attending my first birth-related classes.

First off, huge news: a personal record was broken this past Wednesday, when I found myself in a room with 10 pregnant women. That beats the previous, and quite recent, record of eight.

On this occasion, Katie and myself were actually the second closest to full term, beaten only by a lady who is 38 weeks pregnant (Katie is 37 weeks tomorrow, for anyone wondering!). It’s an odd sense of pride you get when you know you’re in that top group, and that you’ll be having your child before most others in the room. It’s almost a smug feeling, in fact, as though you are all-knowing and wiser than the others around you simply because you’ve gone through more weeks of pregnancy than them. I’m hoping that my ability to notice that smugness highlights the fact that I’m actually not an arsehole, but am just seemingly overtaken by pregnancy-related arrogance sometimes.

The class itself was rather unhelpful, I thought. Katie, however, found it very useful and was full of praise for it. I guess I just found the session at Serenity much more engaging. That’s not to say I didn’t take anything from this class, because I did – I just didn’t like the way the lady hosted it, really.

For one, she’s a strong supporter of home births, and that’s mostly what her job entails apparently. So, when only 1 of 10 ladies in the room said they were having a home birth, our teacher (or whatever you want to call her) decided to quiz people on why they weren’t considering home birth, and then started listing all the reasons why that was a better option than giving birth in a hospial.

My main issue with the above, is that I felt damn uncomfortable for the woman who was doing a home birth. She had to sit there and listen to countless reasons as to why others in the room wouldn’t give birth in their home, and it just plain sucked. She had her reasons for planning to give birth that way, and they were justified, but I bet she felt like everyone in the room was looking down on her in some way. No one was, of course, it’s just that the lady leading the class almost set it up to come across that way without even realising. And then of course, she made the rest of us feel bad about using hospitals as apparently that’s not as good! I don’t know what we were meant to take from this part of the discussion, besides the feeling that whatever birthing area we’ve chosen isn’t good enough for our child.

I also took issue when she started mentioning how babies only started to be born in hospitals when “men wanted to take control of women” who had previously been the ones who took care of all births, supposedly. I found that to be a needless and offensive comment directed at men, and I genuinely think it was an absurd comment to make. I’m all for gender equality, and I think I’ve spoken about it here before, but I’m starting to really get pissed off at the veiled digs at men that attempt to turn everything in the world into a sexism debate. Right then, I lost all interest in what this lady was doing.

As I said, Katie saw it as a very useful session, and I’m glad I attended. I’m more interested in next weeks class, which is meant to focus on labour. I’m hoping it involves breathing exercises, etc, as we’ve not done anything on that yet, and at this point the baby could come at any point so we really need to get our asses into gear. More than likely, we’ll be studying YouTube videos closely, at this rate!

As for the photo, you might be wondering why I was wearing the baby bump and boobs? It was so I could experience what it was like to carry the weight of a baby bump, with this particular outfit designed to give 34 weeks of pregnancy weight to me. I won’t lie, it was surprisingly heavy, and if it’s at all close to a realistic impression of what Katie and all other ladies go through, then I have gained a lot of respect for them. I just wish I hadn’t had to sit there for an hour wearing the bloody thing!



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